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my journey

In April of 1999 i went to have my yearly mammogram done like I was supposed to. When at the clinic-I had my mammogram and was told to wait until someone looked at my films. When the technician returned, I felt a sense that something was wrong. Sure enough, I received a call 2 days later asking me to return for a second mammogram.When I got to the clinic this time, My heart felt heavy, I kept thinking to myself, Theres is nothing wrong. Again I was told to wait until they looked at my film, so I did. This time when the technician returned, I definitley felt by the tone in her voice and the look she gave me, that there was something wrong. While busy at work, I received a call from my doctor, I had the C-word! I kept telling him no over and over, and at that point he said--hold on--let me explain.the type of cancer you have is slow growing and if taken care of immediatley-we are pretty sure we can get all of it and things will be fine. FINE I thought,you just told me I had cancer! The next few days before seeing the doctor, things moved at a very slow pace for me--in my mind, i kept saying, I HAVE CANCER! the thoughts and things that went through my mind were overwhelming!! After surgery and radiation treatments I am now CANCER FREE for over 10 years! Without the wisdom and knowledge of all the professionals--things may have taken a drastic turn in my life that year!! I am VERY happy and thankful everyday that there are places we can go people we can see and talk to--to help all who have to go through this in their lives!

Cindy
Melvindale, MI

SUCCESS!

In January I chose SUCCESS as my word of the year for 2010. Rather than set resolutions I beat myself up for when I break them, instead I pick a positive word to focus my intention and attention on during the year. Little did I know that SUCCESS for me would come to mean that 2010 was the year I beat breast cancer!

In April I was called back after my routine mammogram so they could look at something a little more closely. The second mammo was still not enough and they wanted a biopsy. Not believing I had cancer yet, I went to the best imaging service I could find, the Boston Breast Diagnostic Center in Wellesley MA. I expected the ultra sound to prove it was nothing. Instead, Dr Levin moved right into biopsy. Still expecting negative results, the wind was knocked out of my sails when she called a few days later to tell me in fact I had invasive ductal carcinoma. But the good news, she said, was that it was small, and mine should be more of a nuisance than a treatment. She sent me off with a JILLIES gown to feel more dignified during treatment and the picture is of me wearing one in between getting injected with radio isotopes and wired up for lumpectomy surgery at Brigham and Women's Hospital.

I have been cancer-free since the surgery on June 15th (yay!) and now am in radiation therapy to guard against any future cancer. I will start tamoxifen in about a month. My support network and my positive attitude have never been stronger. I am eating better, exercising more, doing yoga, massage and taking better care of me. I expect to live a long long time!

Kathy Troidle Jackson
Ghent, NY

15 Years Out and Thriving

I was diagnosed in 1994, just before my 48th birthday. At the time, my beautiful 91-year-old mother was living with us and was suffering with progressive dementia, and I felt as if everything in my life was falling apart.

Now that I'm 15 years out, I prefer to think of myself as a thriver, rather than a survivor. I've done so many things I would have never done had I not had the experience of facing my mortality. I danced with the Devil and stomped on his toes.

If I could provide one piece of wisdom for those embarking on the breast-cancer journey, it would be to focus on healing rather than the illness. Defining ourselves by the disease gives it too much power; more than it deserves.

Some day as we continue to raise money and awareness, the word breast cancer will be an echo in the winds of yesterday.

Rachael Clearwater
Portland, OR

Their Fight

My first experience with someone who had cancer was with my grandmothers twin sister, my aunt Sallie. When I was in my early teens she was diagnosed with Breast Cancer and decided not to do anything about it until it was to late. I watched her slowly die from it. A few months after her death my Grandmother, the woman who practically made me the person I am today and the one person I was truley closest to found out she too had breast cancer. Thankfully she caught hers early enough and had her breast removed. My Grandfather had to work and I was only 14 years old. I took the time off of school and stayed with my grandparents until she recovered.She survived and beat her cancer. Then when I was 22 years old I got news that I never wanted to hear again found out that she had ovarian cancer. I once again packed up my life, husband and son and moved in with my grandparents to help take care of my Grandmother, after a two year battle she lost her fight with ovarian cancer. That is something I will never get over is the loss of my Grandmother. After that I had two scares with my mom. Thankfully she is cancer free now. A couple months ago I find out my Mom in law has breast cancer, I know she will beat it. She is strong and bullheaded and has the will to live. She only has to finish her chemo treatments in December and will be cancer free. I thank God for that. I don't want to lose her too. She don't know it but I am close to her like my own mom.

Christin N.
Spruce Knob, WV

Truly Beautified

A couple of weeks ago I spoke with my aunt donna who is very sick. She was diagnosed with breast cancer back in april. She has found out that her cancer is extremely aggressive, and it has spread throughout her entire body. She was explaing to me that the chemo is making her bleed in places it shouldn't, and that her beautiful hair is starting to fall. And she had to be rushed to the hospital for complications from the chemo. As she is explaining all of this to me, I start to tear up. All the while, she remains the positive one. At the end of our conversation she had said to me, "I have been praying for you and your new job." Right then and there, I lost it. I thought to myself, 'how is she the positive one when I am supposed to be? 'Why is she the one praying for me, when I should obviously be the one praying for her?'.

When I spoke with her a couple of days ago, I presented her with a charity event that my family and I are holding in honor of her name; She broke down and cried, and kept saying that she didn't deserve this. I explained to her that her health and her being present for her 7 kids is the number one priority. And as I was about to leave she wished me goodbye, and said I will be praying for you! It is truly amazing how she is so beautifying, and elevating in such a way that it touches my heart and soul, and everyone around her feels the power of her strength and beauty. I am forever grateful to have a person like her in my life.

leah
Phoenix, AZ

Never Lost Her In My Heart

It was April 2007. Aunt Ann had come up to see the nieces and nephews. We had gone to the local diner, when she started to experience back pain. She though nothing of it. The next day she was still hurting,so she decided to back to florida, being that her husband was blind. I remember this moment. She had gotten up from Herr chair and huggged me and said "I love you". Thats the last time I ever talked to her. She had been diagnosed with Stage Four breast cancer on may 26,2007 and passed away may 29,2007; the day she was supossed to get her first chemotherapy treatment. She was a fighter and unfortunetly the cancer beat her at that. I say to those fighting cancer, think about the loved ones who care about you, and use that love to be the fighting force aganist cancer. Fight for yourself and for your loved ones

Anonymous
Clifton, NJ

I am a 19 year survivor!

I was 34 when I found out I had breast cancer. My son was 15 months old! When I woke up from my first surgery my mother and husband came into the room with tears and told me! I ask if I was going to die and the doctor proceeded to tell me our plan and said I can fight this! I went home ordered pizza and beer, had dinner with my family and said I am ready to get this done and move on with my life, I have a lot to do yet! I had a mestectomy; I was in Stage 3 Breast Cancer, had three treatments of aggressive Chemo,I lost all of my hair, stayed in the hospital during each treatment because I was violently sick. After Chemo I took a break,went to Florida to get energized. The ocean I believe has a healing power. I returned home and had elective surgery to have my other breast removed and reconstruction on both breast. I chose this because I did not want to go through this again and was worried I would not see my son grow up! Because of my son I fought hard! He gave me the inspiration to fight! I was blessed and he is now going on 21 years old next month! My husband and I just celebrated our 24th wedding anniversary. My mother is going to be 80 years old in October and she had breast cancer at the age of 36. We are both blessed with life and have Thanked God for our lives and know he has a plan for us. This is just a portion of my story! I hope I inspire those who are in need of motivation to fight! You can do it!! God bless you all!

Debbie Bauer
Louisville, KY

"You have Cancer"

How could I have Cancer? I had children to care for, a husband that needed me. Young Michael was about to go to his first prom. I was much to busy for this. Then I found Rick Michaelson, MD who eased me off that cloud and back to reality. I was frightened, angry, and even embarrassed by this "Breast Cancer". I had the mastectomy, chemo started on our wedding anniversary (so I could celebrate more) and a year later another mastectomy followed by reconstruction. I remember the fear of not being there for my boys. With the most wonderful friends in the world, a brother who ran an ironman (Hawaii) for me, the love of my most special husband and the continued guidance and support from Dr. Michaelson. I am here 18 years later, to not only see Michael and Ryan as grown, successful men but also to be at their weddings to the most wonderful women and to be at the births of each of my four beautiful grandchildren (1 born on our anniversary)! Breasts are for nursing children, their purpose was complete, I did not need them to eat, to communicate, to travel, or to live, what I needed was support, compassion, and the best medical care.
Every woman in the world should be so lucky! Thank You Michael, Michael T, Ryan, Benson, Barbara, Linda, Jerry, Rick, Faye, and all of my brothers and sisters-in-law. Thanks Mom and Dad S. for allowing me a place on the couch when I was to tired to make it home. Mostly Thank you to all of the women before me who heard the same words "You have Cancer". You made my life possible, and it is a grand life!!

Jessica Saul
Tinton Falls, NJ

My Personal Journey

My name is Charron Walker and I am 42 years old. I was diagnosed at the age of 32 with breast cancer. My mother passed away at the age of 34 from this disease. I had a lumpectomy, chemotherapy, radiation and 5 years of hormone therapy. One of the hardest things about having cancer is the feeling of a loss of control. I survived a physical and emotional battle with cancer, which has given me the gift of a new outlook on life. I don't worry about the small stuff; I strive to live life to the fullest. I am a 10-year breast cancer conqueror who has traveled this road, and is still walking in faith. I want to help others on their personal journey.
I am the Founder/Director of Young Survivors Network, Inc. Our mission is to educate, support and advocate for young women who have been diagnosed with breast cancer. We also equip these women in our community with information and a network of caring members, that are willing to give them the best chance available to cope with cancer. We have a support group on the 2nd Tuesday of every month, a Lend A Helping Hand Program where we provide temporary assistance and support to women undergoing treatment for breast cancer. Our services include but are not limited to: transportation to/from chemo treatment, house cleaning, massage therapy, salon services and so much more. We also have community outreach; we participate in health and wellness fairs at colleges, business expos and attend PTA meetings at the public schools in Massapequa, N Massapequa and Massapequa Park on Long Island. "I have been through a lot to do this. Every day is a faith walk for me. God spared me for a reason, and this is my purpose!"

Charron Walker
Massapequa, NY

The Diamond Declaration

The Diamond Declaration

Diamonds - I've always loved them. I always thought that diamonds were for the rich, models, and movie stars. As I grew into my teenage years, whenever I saw someone wearing diamonds, I automatically assumed that they had self-assurance.

My diamond collection started rather tragically. I received my first pair of diamond studs as a teenager when my mother died of pancreatic cancer.

I wore my diamonds while pledging my sorority, during all of my exams, and dates. As I finished my senior year and graduated, I continued to look at my diamonds as they reflected back at me in my mirror. I definitely didn't look like a runway model. Maybe I was maturing or maybe my earlobes just couldn't take the weight of the heavy costume earrings any more.

In 2004, my father became seriously ill. My diamonds, my mother's diamonds, gave me courage to cope with my father's poor health and ultimately his death.

Little did I know, nine and a half weeks after my father's death, my biggest challenge lay aheadâ¦ I was diagnosed with breast cancer. A vision swept through my mind: Chemotherapy + wig = thousands of dollars OR continue to find courage through diamonds.

My diamonds stayed on my ears and eventually grew into a small jewelry collection . They gave me the guts to battle my cancer and helped me to reinvent myself.

Now, wearing diamonds daily is customary, like washing my face every day. When people admire my jewelry they say, "Your earrings and necklace are so beautiful."

I always say to myself: "You have no idea the meaning behind these babies."

And maybe wearing diamonds every day is my simple act of valor and courage, to continue my life as a strong, independent woman who is cancer free.

Randi Rentz
Penn Valley, PA