Stories of Hope

I am Autism.

I am an adult with Autism -- PDD-NOS.

When I was a new born baby, I slept more than my older brother and sister. All of my developing happened in twice the time it should have. Instead of sitting up at six months, I first sat up at 1 year. I crawled at 1 year and walked at 2 years. I started talking at 3 years and my vocabulary was very small. Up until I was about 4 years old, I cried for long periods of time, for hours and hours, almost every single day.

My mom had me tested for every developmental area but got nowhere. She was, however, told that because of my delays I should have therapy of the following types: speech, cognitive, physical, occupational, play and social. The speech and physical therapy I got at public school. The others my mom took me to.

I attended two years of kindergarten and two years of 12th grade. Otherwise, except for being pulled out of class for different therapies by my mom or the school, I had a pretty regular school career. I played the flute in the middle school band. I found most of my friends in my special education classes and also through Special Olympics. All through school I was on the Special Olympic Bowling team. I got good grades and enjoyed school for the most part. I have completed a couple of semesters of college but have not earned a degree. I'm currently taking the drivers education course online and hope to get my license within the next year.

I think Autism has made me look at my life as something special and unique and has taught me that nothing can bring me down! Enjoy every second of your life by living it the way you want to. I know that some things are scary and it's easy to get intimidated but you just have to take it step by step.
I wouldn't change who I am today. I love who I am! So should you!

Emily Delgado
Austin, TX

Our son Billy

Billy is a very handsome little man. Now age 8 years. He has gone though a lot to get where he is at. Billy was diagnosed at age 4 years. Billy is a wonderful caring little guy that struggles every day. Billy enjoys being outdoors for any reason, playing with his lego's and building anything he can. Billy seems to put a smile on everyone's face after meeting him. As his parents we have also been through it, seen it or heard it. Our son is our life and we would never change anything. Mommy and daddy love you billy! Never change who you are.

Chris and Letta Martin
Salem, OR

From Nonverbal to Future BCBA

My name is Michelle Zeman. I'm 21 years old and am living in Fishers, IN.

When I was born, my mom thought there was something different about me. I cried a lot more than my brothers did, I developed much slower, and I hated affection. These were just a few items. She had gone to different doctors to see what could be wrong. All of them told her "it's a third child thing" or "you're crazy, she's fine".

It took me until I was 3 years old when my mom got me to a doctor who said she should get me tested for Autism right away. A few short months later, I was diagnosed with borderline severe Autism.

I went through eight years of ABA therapy, a lot of bullying, being told I was an Autistic freak by my father, and being told I wasn't going to go anywhere in life. I was told I would barely make it through high school, never become independent, and that I would need assistance for the rest of my life.

Here I am at 21 years old already going for my Master's degree in ABA and just a few days of moving out of my mom's house. I graduated high school with a 3.2 GPA and college (in 3.5 years, might I add) with a 3.2. I'm also about to start an ABA Therapist job in less than three weeks and am currently working towards BCBA certification.

Just by breathing, I am proving people that a diagnosis of Autism is not a death sentence. I am letting the world know that anything is possible when you put your mind to it. Hope is alive, just believe it and cherish all of the milestones you or your child has accomplished.

Thank you for letting me share my story.

- Michelle

Michelle Zeman
Fishers, IN

My baby's Story

I had a son 9 weeks early, with many developmental delays. He started therapies at 4 months old; speech, PT, OT, and developmental intervention. He banged his head into metal file cabinets, he pulled his own hair, he cried a lot, and he just seemed like a very tense, angry little person. Our older son has Aspergers, but still, we didn't put two and two together, because they seemed so different from one another. Finally, in 3rd grade, our youngest was tested and diagnosed with autism. Even though it made sense to me, I still didn't want to accept that I hadn't caught it myself after already having a child on the spectrum. He's 11 years old now, and he's gone through some struggles, and continues to struggle, but he's made progress, and that's what is all about. He's suffered through bullying, knowing he's different, desperately wanting friends, but everyone seems to think he's just "weird," and academic difficulties. He has a hard life, but we try to make it as fun and encouraging as possible. The photo I've included is one of him at a military museum near Ft. Bragg when we went on vacation this summer. He is obsessed with all things military, and this is the happiest I've seen him in a long time. He wants to enlist after high school, but I've recently found out that no branch of the military will accept him with his diagnosis and medication. I don't have the heart to tell him. He will join the cadet program at his middle school in the fall. After middle school, he'll join the high school JROTC, but that's probably as close as he'll get to being in the military, sadly. We worry about his future. We worry about his present... We just worry.

Lauren Aranda
Louisville, KY

My Big Little Brother

Growing up, I got used to my older brother Leo not speaking verbally. I didn't know why but it never stopped us from having fun. When he was 6, he began speaking his first words and my mother was told he had Autism. She didn't know what it was and we were confused for many years. Thankfully, the game 'Word Phonics' and a lot of Saturday morning cartoons helped improve his speech, but still reacted to people physically and did not realize he was hurting others.

In his teens, he always stayed alone and didn't bother making new friends. My family knew he did not understand the questions he was asked by people. We didn't know what to do. He told us us he knows he's different and won't be like anyone else. I felt I failed him. I no longer knew how to protect him.

He is now 22. Our 10 pound dog was added in our lives and my brother absolutely adores her and she has become therapeutic for him. He had become a gentle giant.

I always felt I needed to protect him because I felt it was my duty. But he never forgot that I was the little sister and will do just about anything to make me laugh. On my birthday, he finally decided to be a part of the party and celebrate with me. For the first time, I saw him have fun with people other than our family. It brought me to tears. In that moment I knew I had not failed him. Leo is my biggest inspiration. He never pushed me away from helping him and he always fought to protect me too. Autism has shown me that it's just a title. Though society will make him look out to be different, he is intelligent. We just have to be open minded and listen. He will always be my biggest inspiration to NEVER give up what I'm passionate about. Leo will always be my Big "Little" Brother and I will always be his Little "Big" Sister =)

Liliana Aceves
Whittier, CA

verdrietig en boos op de wereld en de buurman.

Onze buurman is zijn voor- en achtertuin aan het verbouwen, slopen en opnieuw aan het inrichten.. Opzich niets mis mee, toch?
Voor iedereen de normaalste zaak van de wereld behalve voor mijn zoon. Klassiek autist met ADHD.
Eerst ging voor de heg eruit, gelukkig was mijn zoon die dag niet thuis dat de buurman aan de slag ging. Maar dat was natuurlijk een kaalslag die je niet over het hoofd kan zien als je bij ons naar binnen wil. Bovendien was het de laatste dag dat hij naar de boerderij was. Super verdrietig thuis komen en dan zo een vreselijke buurman die de heg weghaalt..... Nu moet er achter, een oude schuur, straks wijken, want de buurman wil zijn nieuwe schuur helemaal aan de achterkant bouwen, maar omdat het gebouwtje in tweeen gesplitst is zal ons schuurtje, of als half schuurtje moeten doorgaan, of ook gesloopt moeten worden.. Daar zijn we zelf nog niet over uit.
De buurman gaat eerst zijn nieuwe schuur bouwen, maar is daar nog lang niet aan toe. Eerst gaat hij een hek om zijn voortuin maken en de boel betegelen. Maar in de gedachten van mijn zoon is hij onze schuur al aan het slopenen wat gaat er dan gebeuren? Hij kan er niet van slapen.
Moeten wij maar aan de buurman vragen of hij het hierbij laat? Wordt vervolgd.

Jacqueline
Zaandam, Netherlands

Embrace the Amazing

My 3 year old grandson (Kyle) has non-verbal autism. Prior to his birth I had heart surgery which left me disabled,depressed and feeling sorry for myself. but Kyle is such an amazing child;he sees the world in a beautiful non-jaded way;he is Always so happy; sure he has his melt downs which breaks my heart,but he has taught me to look at ALL people differently. No one can make me smile,laugh and yes cry like he does. I love you with all my heart Kyle

You'll never walk alone!
Grandpa

Fred Bamber
Merritt Island, FL

A love note to my son

How do I translate pain into love?

Autism.

You came into this world with it, and you will leave this world with it.
More importantly, what you have chosen to do with it has changed my heart forever.

You have fought harder than anyone I know.
You never gave up, and through the struggle and tears you always chose to fight for yourself...you taught me how to fight for myself and my happiness.
I have never seen such a beautiful soul.
Thank you for showing a jaded self how to find the beauty in life.
You believe in happily ever after, in the magic of life...especially when I had given up on it.
You actually stop to smell the roses and skip while you run...you helped me slow down and live.
You love interaction with people no matter how brief it is...when in the past I would avoid most strangers, I now welcome the small talk.

The ways you have touched my heart and opened my mind are endless.
You saved me in more ways I can communicate...ironic since I am the one who can talk, you speak worlds more than I ever could.

Through your sheer presence in my life I have no choice but to be better.

So just as I have been trying for the past 9 years, I will continue to do better every day.
For you, and for the example you have already set in such a brief time.
I will continue to bring awareness of your life, your struggles, and show the gift of learning from them.
You get enough hardships out there in your playground of life.
I've seen you treated cruelly by your peers, called harsh names.
Yet through it all you came out shining...you believed in happily ever after.

If I didn't know better I would think you had already lived twenty lifetimes, and I was blessed to have you in this one.

So today, and every day I will "Light it up Blue", Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Indigo...

Someday others too will see your beautiful rainbow as I do.

Kary Whitaker
San Juan Capistrano, CA

My son Danny

When during a phone conversation one day, he told me he likes being Autistic. Couldn't make me more proud of him!!

Anonymous
Kingsford Heights, IN

A Few Good Friends

I started out my young adult life pretty normal. I still had a lot of the shyness that comes along with autism, but as is the case with most small children most of the children were curious and often came up to me allowing to I open up. It wasn't until around jr. high that I started to notice I didn't understand anyone else. I tried to put myself out there and make friends. It worked to an extent because people seemed to like me, but I still had an overwhelming feeling of loneliness. I felt like I had to hide my personality and act different ways around different people. It wasn't until I went to college that I began to understand what I had which still didn't happen until years of research. Things were necessarily better at this point. My mom had tried to get me test but my stepmom tried to force me to be who she wanted and my dad denies anything that could be seen as weak. I told them what I had discovered and it was the same reaction years later. It wasn't until a close friend from jr high graduated college and reached out to reconnect that I truly started to feel "normal". I discovered what something as simple as someone reaching out for friendship could do for someone with autism. I still have trouble with social interaction but I don't feel as afraid about the future. I've began to go out with friends again and feel like I'm that much close to this ideal I use to have. When people didn't treat me weird because I'm introverted and quiet. Thru my friend people have learned to let me warm up, and not try to read me which usually leads to false opinions and extreme sadness and frustration on my part. I know things aren't perfect and probably won't ever be, but I know with a few good friends there's hope. With true friends around life doesn't seem so scary and un-comprehensible. It seems livable.

Jared Blanco
Arlington, TX