As a preteen I was told by God that I was going to die early. Every new year I sneared at God. I was also fasinated with the number 4, everything in 4's and thought when I reach 44 something special is going to happen to me like the lottery. On my 44th birthday I was told I had breast cancer. I snearned no more but was floored of what I just heard my boss a Dr. said "you have carcenoma of the breast" Oh as a asst. in a Drs. office I had access to my results and pulled them out on my own and after reading them wrong 4 hr later I was giving my proud results to my employer and what like I said was a shock. I lived thrugh it well and now 4 yrs later am diagnoised again. A radical mastectony at a single age of 48 was not in my plan either. Its been hard this time. My family expects me to get by it like a breeze like I proved the first time, but its not. I had more chemo than last time, Im older, and with first cancer and loosing my job and loosing my house, everything. Even my precious cat "BOY" who helped me through the first one. Im a cancer ridden, no boobs, no hair no eyebrow bag lady. But as I ponder maybe 44 was a lesson and not a gift. I now have to pull up my boots depend on people be humble and start a new life. Maybe this time I will be happier, maybe live a little slower. But in 4 yr Im going to have my own home, anew car, new breast and maybe be alot smarter not to snear at God.

Tammy
Homosassa, FL